The Success Nuggets

The Success Nuggets #56 - The Grind Behind the Glory by Joshua Tate

• Season 3 • Episode 13

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Born in a shelter. Raised in chaos. Fed from trash cans.
 Joshua Tate’s story isn’t about pity - it’s about power.

From dumpster diving in L.A. to walking onto a Division 1 football team, from losing his father to working 110-hour weeks, Joshua turned every struggle into a stepping stone. When life hit hardest, he chose faith, family, and purpose over fame.

In this episode of The Success Nuggets Podcast, David Abel unpacks how Joshua built himself from the ground up — and why his greatest victory isn’t success, but fatherhood.

🎧 A must-listen for anyone who’s ever had to build without a backup plan.

Nugget of the  day " When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you’ll be successful.” — Eric Thomas 

With thanks to One Golden Nugget and Maxwell Preece for editing, support and artwork

SPEAKER_00:

Everybody wants the glory, but few know the grind. Success isn't about what you earn, it's about what you learn. The next episode is a story about a man who started without a silver spoon and gave up everything they said to find what truly mattered. Joshua Tate is a motivational speaker.

SPEAKER_01:

How are you? Hey, what's going on, David? I am doing well. How are you today? I'm good. Where are you joining us from today? Man, David, I'm joining all the way from Memphis, Tennessee.

SPEAKER_00:

Is that Elvis Country? Yes, it is. It's Elvis Town. Yes, sir. Hey, in my intro, I said everybody wants a glory. Very few know the grind. And we'll get into that. But your story really was the toughest upbringings. People being born without a silver spoon in their mouth. You had to hustle. Can you give the audience just a little bit of a flavor of your upbringing?

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, a little bit of my upbringing, man. Just starting off from the very beginning. When I was born, my mother was in an abuse shelter, and that was very rough for her. But it was very rough on me because I believe you know the things that you experience while you're inside the room, they affect you as you come out. And so my journey in life started just like that. It started with my mother being in a bruise shelter and fleeing from my father, going 2,000 miles away from Memphis, Tennessee to Los Angeles, California, to have some freedom, but also to live a life that she wanted. But that was from the very beginning. But as I grew up, my father, he did come down to Los Angeles. And my mother and father they came back together. So my childhood was a lot of my mother and father coming together, then separating, coming together, then separating. I saw a lot of abuse from my father and my mother arguing, verbal abuse was an everyday thing in my household. But then also that led to some physical abuse as well. But some of the challenges that I also faced as a child was the way that my father provided for our home and how we took care of ourselves was we were in the city of Los Angeles and we went dumpster diving. And what that is is we went around Los Angeles, California, going into the dumpsters, going into the trash cans in Hollywood and Beverly Hills and all around South Central Los Angeles. So that way we can find things to recycle: plastic bottles, glass bottles, cans. And as a little boy, me and my brothers will go inside those nasty dumpsters. Like we would go in the dumpsters field with all kinds of disgusting things, you know, things that people throw away. So rotten food, sometimes even dead animals was in those trash cans that we were in. And that was just how we made a way to pay the bills at home. And even further, we also found food in those trash cans to eat. And that we did that in my life all the way up to 18. I ate food out of the trash cans. And that's something that I was ashamed of and I was embarrassed about. I didn't want anybody to know that my source of food was from the trash cans. And even at home, a little bit more of some of the things that I went through is the homes that we stayed in, it was filled with rats. And I'm not talking about the small mice. Yes, it was small mice, but we had large rats in our homes as well. And as a little boy, that was something that really traumatized me. Even I remember as a young boy, just sleeping on the floor and just wrapping myself up with my blanket and crying myself to sleep because I didn't want the rats to touch me. I don't want them to get on me. And the one of the most scariest things was when you have to wake up and go use the restroom because you don't know what you're gonna step on. And when you turn the lights on in the restroom, you see roaches crawling all over the walls. So that was a bit of my upbringing, just really dealing with those things of you know, not being in a in a relationship like my father and my mother having relational problems and growing up, you know, really not having much, that was really difficult for me as a child. Oh man.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh yeah. I really appreciate you sharing that with everyone. And I know what it's like to have people shouting all the time. Maybe you feel like a referee. I don't know what it's like to grow up in poverty. When the shout shouting can affect you as well, it can make you quite a nervous person. But you got into contact sport, you you wanted to be in the NFL. Yes. And when we first met, we talked about having a burning desire. But when did you feel like that was something you wanted to do, become a pro athlete?

SPEAKER_01:

So when I was in elementary school, that's when I desired to be a professional athlete because in school I play sports for elementary. I remember even how we started our days. School in Los Angeles is a lot different here in Memphis, Tennessee. But in Los Angeles, we had a big open field, and I remember racing other students early in the morning, doing a hundred-yard dash, being first place. And so I always had this desire. But I had friends who play football, and I've always loved football because that's what we see, but I couldn't do anything about it. Why? Because my parents didn't have the money to pay for me to be a part of a football league. And it was just$275. And I remember just really crying out to my mom, crying out to my dad of me wanting to play football. And it even makes me emotional now because I was really sad about as a child because I get I didn't get to experience actually playing football. When I moved to Memphis, Tennessee in the eighth grade, that's when I actually was able to do it. And I wasn't good in the beginning. I wasn't really good because it was a lot of things that I had to learn. But every single day from the eighth grade, it was my burning desire that I was gonna make it to the NFL. And every day I showed up, even when I wasn't doing the drills correctly, even when I felt embarrassed because I didn't know how to do it like everybody else. I showed up every single day and put the work in. Perseverance? Perseverance for sure. When I look back at my younger self, I'm very proud of him because a lot of people, it's hard for them to start something where they're not good at it. You know, you show up on the first day and you see everybody, they know how to do the drills, but you don't know how to do anything, right? The only thing that you have is heart, the only thing that you have is a burning desire. And that's how I showed up. Something that motivated me when I was younger. I listened to a guy named Eric Thomas. And one of the things that he talked about was putting in the work, showing up and grinding and putting in more work than everybody else. And he used to say hard work beat talent when talent failed to work hard. And I would push myself because I knew that if I continue to show up, I continue to lift my weights, do my drills, not only while I was at school, but also when I went home after school, after practice, after I got home and I ate and did a little bit of relaxation and got my homework done. I went back outside and I started to do my drills again. I was running a hundred meter yards on the outside from light pole to light pole in the dark. And I remember just doing that consistently to where my dad was actually like, You're doing too much, son. You're doing too much. See, my dad, he was a pastor, and one of the things that he wanted us to prioritize was reading our Bible and praying and spending time with God. And I was so I was doing that, but I was so focused on football, I was doing spending hours outside just training, doing jump ropes. My father, he said, Josh, I think you put in that before God. You can't make football an idol. And I'm like, Dad, I understand. I'm not making it an idol, but I have a goal. Like I want to make it to the NFL. That's my goal. And so, yeah, that's a little bit about that.

SPEAKER_00:

When you moved to Memphis, Tennessee, were you still poor and still having to do the dumpster diving, or things got any better?

SPEAKER_01:

Well, actually, moving down here, things didn't get better, the situations just changed. So I still was going inside of the dumpsters, but down here in Memphis, Tennessee, my dad, he didn't focus on recycling plastic bottles and cans. He switched to start getting cardboard. And I remember for me, it was a little bit of going. We still got food out the trash cans, though. I remember the grocery stores down here getting trash, I mean, getting the food out the trash, waiting for, you know, at five o'clock, that's when they would throw away the food in the trash cans, and we'll be back there ready to get the food out the out the trash as soon as they throw it in there. But moving down here to Memphis, yeah, we collected cardboard. And what my dad, what he'd done, he had a minivan that he owned, and he would take the, we would take all of the seats out, and we will go around the city of Memphis and we would collect cardboard and just stack it inside of the van so we can reach all the way to the top. And then my father had welded something on the top of his vehicle so we can stack the cardboard on top of the vehicle. And I'll be honest, you know, that was very embarrassing because there were some days to where it was cardboard stacked all the way up on the van, inside the van, and I would be in the front seat with me and my sister in the front, and he would drop us off to school. And the thing that we would see was the students outside just looking at us coming out of that van, knowing, like, man, them kids are poor. I still feel that pain, you know, the embarrassment, the shame as a young kid not being able to control what my life looks like and having to go through this, but yet I still persevered through that. Yet I still showed up to school and I did my best. I made good grades, I showed up for practice and I became better. It transitioned different, but still living in homes of rats and roaches because it was a lot of us. It was six of us that was here, and my dad had to take care of us by himself, and he was an older man as well. See, my dad, he had me when he was 54. So when I was in middle school and high school, he was in his 60s, he had a hunch in his back, he walked with a cane, and people would make fun of me, you know, just even having an older dad. But you know, that was like hardly the American dream.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes, so far from it. Having a target on your back can really push you on. Did you ever win people over? Did people give you a break? Was there any time where that kind of broke and people just just give this guy a chance? Well, you know what?

SPEAKER_01:

As far as I did get a break, but that break came through me using the knees right here. Um I remember even in middle school, in elementary school, I used to fight a lot. And even when I was in Los Angeles, I was leaning towards more being a gang member because that was the way that you get respect. And in Los Angeles, elementary, I used to bully students because I wanted to let out that fighting a lot, and even as I went to middle school, every day I would fight. And so people didn't want to really mess with me because they knew that I loved to fight. But one thing that changed for me when I went to high school, that's when the insecurity, that's when the shame and the just feeling having low self-esteem, that's when it really got to me a lot. And instead of me fighting, I actually just closed in. And it even turned around to where when I was in high school, the older, the seniors in the school where they would pick on me and talk about me. But because I carried myself the way that I carried myself, and I've always worked hard in the gym, so I didn't get messed with a lot beyond people just making fun of me.

SPEAKER_00:

When you go inside yourself and you're just a young teen as well, it's it's hard to make sense of the world and be angry. Yeah, you're a romantic, and Hazy, there was a certain person who stood by you through all this that that you could talk to.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, yeah, absolutely. And one of the one of those persons was my current wife right now. You see, me and my wife, we met when we were in middle school in the middle of all the chaos, in the middle of everything that was going on. She was a person that I found solitude in. Other than my belief in God and other than my faith, just really having her to walk with me through life and be there in my low moments, and my moments of insecurity, of low self-esteem, and my moments to where life was really difficult and life was really hard. She was the person that made me happy. I found joy with my girlfriend even at a younger age. And I knew that she was the one for me. And I told her, I at 12 years old, I told her, you're gonna be my wife, and we're gonna have children together, and we're gonna have a happy life. And from the age of 12, she has been in my life consistently being that person to support me, being that person, to love me, being that person, to be by my side and to also believe in me, even when I don't believe and when I didn't believe in myself. She was there for me, and that's my wife, Crystal. I love her, man.

SPEAKER_00:

Go crystal, go, Crystal. Big shout out to Crystal, big shout out to Crystal and Joshua. Fantastic. I think about 15 years, is that right now? Yeah, mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01:

That's when I think about it. See, I I have forgot, but I'm 27, so it's yeah, it's been about 15 years, and we've been married for eight years, man. We got married when I was 18 years old. As soon as my father passed away, we got married. So it's been uh married for eight years, but together for 15. Beautiful. Okay, what happened next? Man, so life changed. And as I just mentioned, my father passed away when I was 18. So I graduated high school, and things were really looking good, but it was some challenges because even while I was in high school, my father was sick, and I kind of knew that that time was coming for him to pass away because he had cancer. And with the cancer, I saw how who he was just diminished really fast. I started college late, and with me starting college late, I wanted to stay in the city of Memphis because I didn't want to leave because my girlfriend was with me, but also my father is sick. I was gonna go to the University of Memphis and walk on the football team. When I when I got enrolled, I went to them and I was like, Can I walk on the football team? They said, Hey, you missed the deadline, there's nothing we can do about it. You have to wait till next year. And so, what happened during that time? I was focused. I continued training, I continued working out. And even after my father passed, it was a bit challenging because now I had to become a man, right? I had to take care of everything. You know, what I can say is even though I wasn't living in the best of the homes, even though I didn't have everything that I wanted, at least I had someplace to stay, right? Even though I had food out the trash, at least I had food to eat. And when my father passed away, it was it's up to me to take care of myself. 30 days after he passed, an eviction notice came on our door. You have 30 days to get out. And that's when life really hit. With me being in college, now I have to be a man. I was more focused. And so I was working and going to college, but I was still doing my training and still focusing on my goal to making it to the NFL. And then the next year came around for tryouts. And I remember walking on the football team. I went to the meeting, we went to the walkout tryouts. And when I say it was very difficult, it was difficult because they wanted to see who was talented, but they wanted to see who had heart, who wasn't going to give up. And out of those 133 guys, they chose seven of those people. And the second person that they called was Joshua Tate. And I remember when I made the the trials for walking on at the University of Memphis, it was a moment that was surreal because all of my hard work that I've put in through middle school, through high school, like it's finally here. Like I'm here walking on a D1 football team, and I made it. Right. It was great. But one of the things that changed was me and my wife, we decided to have a child. And in that moment, I didn't think about how having a child was really going to change my situation because I didn't know what was going to come from us having a child. But I remember my wife being pregnant and still, you know, going to the trainings and being a part of the team. But one of the biggest things that was before me was, well, Josh, we're having a child, you have to take care of your family. You know, you're your husband and now you're going to be a father. That's more responsibility that you have to take care of your family. So that weighed on me heavily. I remember even the mentors that I had in my life talking with them, like, what should I do? Should I make the sacrifice of, you know, not working and going all in and football? So that way I know I'm going to make it because I know I have the work ethnic. I know that I'm going to work harder than anyone. And just talking with my mentors, they gave me the realistic real life talk. Josh, I understand. And one of my mentors, he made it to the NFL actually. And he just he talked to me for real. And he said, Josh, I understand your dream, but I've been to the NFL. I've been one of those players that you desire to be. And when I tell you, it's not easy as how you think it is. It's really hard. The people that have skill, the people that have talent, it's even hard for them. And just hearing all of these things, I'm trying to figure out what I should do. But what I end up doing was just being the man that I'm supposed to be, taking care of my wife and taking care of my child. And the biggest thing though, at five months pregnant, we found out that our child was going to have a special needs condition. And with even knowing that my child was going to have that special needs condition, I kind of knew that the right decision for me to make was to be the man and take care of my family and provide. And that's when I chose a different direction.

SPEAKER_00:

The direction that truly mattered. A hundreds of hours a week. You had to work, a burning desire to be a good dad, to become entrepreneurship. How have you found the world of business and this whole new thing that you're experiencing?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, man, it's really been it's been awesome. It's been challenging, though. You see, my son, when he was born, he came out the wound with over 75% of his bones broken. And when he came out the wound with this condition called osteogenesis imperfecta, it's a brutal bone disease. In that moment, I knew that I had to take another step and really step up to be the man and the husband and the father that I had to be because my wife, my son needed someone that was going to be there with him. And so I just told my wife, hey, I'm going to do what I have to do, and I'm going to work and take care of us. And you don't have to worry about anything. What I ended up doing was working two manual labor jobs. I worked at a warehouse overnight. And during the day, I had worked at this company called Rental Center, doing all of that work and barely making enough to get by and barely making enough to pay off our debts. And that's why it took me two years because no college degree, no experience in anything. So I had to just get the jobs that I can do is use my body, you know, use my muscles and my strength. And it was in that moment to where I just knew that I couldn't, that this isn't how my life is going to be. Even when I was 18 years old and I started my first job, when I first went there, I made it up in my mind that I wasn't going to be here long. And the reason why I had that desire was because when I when I signed up to go work at FedEx at the warehouse, I saw how a lot of people they weren't living the life that they wanted to live. I see I saw how a lot of people gave up on their dreams and they just chose to settle for less. After doing that for a couple of years, I was away from home. My marriage was struggling. Me being present as a father. I would come home just to sleep, take a shower and eat, and I'll go right back to work. And that was a struggle for my marriage. That was a struggle for me as a father, and even me personally, because I lost myself. I have to change my mindset and I have to learn. And that's when I had this burning and desire that I'm going to figure out how to make money. I'm going to figure out how to be more than what I am right now, how to have more and how to do more. So my first step was with Dave Ramsey. I remember watching all of his podcasts that he would drop. I remember getting his books and just really studying and learning about money and how to get out of debt and you know how to live the life that you want, how to have freedom through your finances. And that's the reason why I worked those hundred hours as well, because I had my goal that I was going to get out of debt and that I was going to be free so that I can provide a great life for my family, but also have freedom. And just through learning, I've been on this progression, David, of really just going through I learned about how to manage my money, how to budget so many different things that I've learned along this journey. But that was the next way, you know, having your money work for you, having a system work for you, creating opportunity in your life by developing skill sets, getting more skills so that you can become more valuable in the marketplace. And so I've been on this journey for these past seven years of just learning and growing in entrepreneurship.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes, skills are assets. Now, let's have some quick fire stuff. Do you get up and you're like, these are the things, or do you have to take a deep breath in the morning, or you like jump out of bed? Like, how is it for you trying to find beating yourself every day?

SPEAKER_01:

Oh man, absolutely. Man, what it is is it's not motivation. I would definitely tell you it's not motivation because motivation comes and goes. But for me, is always having that goal, always knowing exactly where I'm headed and where I'm aiming the direction that I want to go. Because one thing about really developing yourself and changing your life is it doesn't change by motivation, it doesn't change by belief. That's important, but it changes by taking action each and every day. And even me waking up this morning, I started my day, not rushing with you know, fake, you know, getting on social media, figuring out, checking my emails, how I wake up is waking up, remembering my per my purpose, remembering my mission, reading it out loud, reading my affirmations, encouraging myself, building myself up. And when I'm done with that, I know exactly what I need to do today to be closer then to my goal than where I was yesterday.

SPEAKER_00:

You can stumble, you can fall, and you can get back up again. It's easy not to get back up again, it's easy to blame. How do you see the path? Do you see it as like a mountain you're climbing? Or this is just like A to B, just one day at a time.

SPEAKER_01:

For me, it's one step at a time. It's not even one day at a time because the day is long. It's doing the next thing that I need to do. That's what it is. It's it's set up this me doing this next thing is going to help me reach that goal. But then after this thing, then I'm doing that thing, then I'm doing that thing. And so it's really just taking one step at a time because these small steps that we take, they add up to eventually get us to the top of the mountain.

SPEAKER_00:

I've stopped looking at it as a mountain. I just try to, in my head, minimize it, just try and flatten it that it's just a path. Yeah, it's just a path. It's who we're becoming along the way. Ever had a time where you've just blamed everyone else?

SPEAKER_01:

And one thing I learned about being a victim, and I'm not gonna go into detail on this, but after experience one of the I'll say, after experienced the a time of my life where I felt the most successful, right after that, I went to being the most unsuccessful version of myself. I hit rock bottom and I was in a very, very low, dark place. And in that place, I blamed everybody. I blamed the people who did things to me that affected me in a negative way. I blamed God for the situations that He put in my life and the things that I was dealing with. I was blaming everything. And one thing that I realized in that situation, David, was the reason why I got there was because I had a negative mindset. See, I had a victim mentality to where I gave my power away to everybody else. When I woke up late, I blamed another person for why I woke up late. When I didn't have the money that I wanted, I blamed the person that took my money away. When I when I was having problems in my marriage at this point, in my lowest point, I blamed my wife. I blamed everybody else for why I was where I was at. And I noticed that when my life started to turn around and the change that took place was when I took responsibility. Not for what happened, but when I took responsibility for the actions that I was going to take next. You see, because I woke one thing that I realized, and I encourage everybody if you're able to wake up, if you can breathe, if you can move, if you can think, if you can talk, it's no excuse why you can't take the next step. And that's one thing when it comes to having that victim mentality, it's always knowing that you have the responsibility to take action to do the next thing that's going to help you move forward. And it's not nobody else's fault.

SPEAKER_00:

When I was 27, I don't know if I was talking like this. I'm sure I was getting around people than always trying to uh lift them up. Nowadays, you are lifting people up and you are inspiring people with motivational talks and just getting out there. Can you tell us a bit more about that and and and how it is, you know, facing a crowd?

SPEAKER_01:

I've been wanting to be a motivational speaker since I was a young kid as well, because I used to listen to all the motivational talks that encouraged me, that empowered me, that uplifted me. And I knew that I wanted to do that. But for me, I said, you know what? I'm gonna wait until I become very successful. In the beginning, it was when I make it in the NFL, then I'm gonna be able to encourage everybody. Then after that, I said, you know what? When I make my millions of dollars and I'm a successful business owner, that's when I'm going to do it. But after life took a turn, after me, you know, making all the money that I've made and I hit rock bottom, that's when it really hit me that this is what I'm called to do. And this is when I need to do it. I need to do it now. And so when it comes to me motivating and encouraging people, what I what I do is I see myself in that audience. You see, I see the people that went through things that I went through, the people that was broken, the people that was left out, the people who don't believe in themselves, or the people who don't believe that they can be more, that they can do more, and that they can have more in their life. And I see that person and I encourage that person. And what it started with, it started with me encouraging myself. You see, the person that I am today, David, as I look back two years ago, the person that was there two years ago was the victim mentality. Was a person that was crying every day, wondering how they're going to get out of the mess that they made in their life. It was a person who didn't have hope, a per a person who didn't see the good things in life anymore. And as I'm on my journey to encourage people, that's who I speak to. I speak to the people who's going through difficult things in their life. I speak to the students who are growing up in bad situations, who don't believe that their life could get better. And that's who I speak to. And that's why I motive, that's why I choose to be a motivational speaker, is because I understand what it's like to be low. I understand what it's like to have no hope. I understand what it's like to be in a place to where you feel like you can't be more, but I also know that you can because I'm living proof that you can wake up and you can take action each and every day and change your life and be better.

SPEAKER_00:

Brilliant stuff. Audience, well, ladies and gentlemen, he grew up taking rubbish out of the trash just to eat. Dreamt of the NFL. He worked over a hundred hours a week just to survive. And then he gave it all up to be a good dad. And he's now lifting others up. Joshua Tate, thank you so much for coming on the success novel today. I can't thank you enough. Man, oh absolutely. I'm glad to be here. Thank you so much for having me, David. I really appreciate it. That's good. And before you go, and thank you again for set sharing your story, how you've turned struggle into strength, pain into purpose. And I believe anyone who can turn fatherhood into their greatest victory is really where it is. Do you have a one golden nugget for life?

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, I do have one golden nugget for life. And what that would be is no matter where you are, no matter who you are, no matter what your circumstance or situation look like, you can be more, you can do more, and you can have more. But you have to believe that you can. And once you believe, you have to take action each and every day. And last thing, you have to be disciplined. No matter what comes up in life, no matter how you feel, no matter what thoughts you have, continue doing the work that will make you be the person to have the things and to do the things.

SPEAKER_00:

Beautiful guys, that is a simple recipe. Joshua, where can everyone follow you?

SPEAKER_01:

So you all can follow me on all of my social media platforms. It's Joshua underscore h underscore tate. So on Instagram, Facebook, on LinkedIn, on YouTube, and on TikTok, you can follow me there or visit my website as well to learn more at www.joshuatate.org.

SPEAKER_00:

Right. I'm logging on. I'm gonna go and have a look at it. And I believe we have got ourselves an absolute future star. I can't wait to keep following you, have you back again, and see where you are when you're 40 and see everything you accomplished. And on your 40, you can tell me you're coming up 30 years with your wife and all your family stories. But I will see you again. And once again, Joshua, thanks for coming on. Man, and thank you so much, David. And for everyone else, tune in. The success nuggets continues.